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10 Subtle Signs He is Totally Smitten by You

by | Love

Mar 10, 2023

Guys may be great at hiding signs that they are head over heels for you. But luckily, for every woman out there questioning what a man feels for her, our editors are just as great at uncovering subtle signs. Here are 10 subtle signs that he is totally smitten by you even when he doesn’t act it.

1. He Talks with so Much Passion About You

What does he sound like when he talks about you? If he sounds bland and uninterested, that may be a red flag—he is not as interested in you as you want to believe. But if he talks about you with a lot of interest, then he likes you. 

Ask a couple of your friends to reach out to him and ask about you. They can, of course, ask something like: “Do you think Paula is amazing?” 

If he sounds quite passionate as he talks to them about you, then you’ve got one box of ten ticked. He is definitely smitten by you. 

Read: 10 Signs He Likes You And Wants To Take Things Further

2. He Shows Healthy Jealousy From Time to Time

The subject of jealousy is quite a delicate one. The line between healthy jealousy and unhealthy jealousy is so thin that if you do not pay much attention, you may mistake one for the other. 

I believe healthy jealousy is not borne out of insecurity but rather out of genuine care. For example, a man might show healthy jealousy by advising that you stay from some guy friends because he thinks they might harm you. 

Of course, he may be jealous of them. But what really drives him is to care about your safety.

On the other hand, unhealthy jealousy is borne out of insecurity, showing itself in control. (People who show unhealthy jealousy are usually quite controlling). 

Unhealthy jealousy would be a guy keeping you from hanging out with your friends even after you have promised that you are safe. He doesn’t care about your safety much.

If a man shows some healthy jealousy towards you from time to time, it is a big sign that he is smitten by you.

3. You Catch Him Staring

Guys are more visual than women when it comes to romantic attraction. 

Ubong, a relationship expert, says. “If you want to know just what a guy loves, watch how he looks at it.” 

If a man looks at you with a calculated carefulness that may even make you blush, there is such a big chance that he is about to be or already smitten by you. 

4. He Can’t Keep His Hands to Himself

This does not in any way suggest that a man who is totally smitten by you is going to touch you inappropriately without your consent. It suggests that men like to reach for what ‘smites’ their eyes. They often want to touch and feel it. 

So, a man who is totally smitten by you would always want to have some form of body contact. 

If not rubbing your thighs, then hugging you for longer than regular hugs take. {Read: 10 Ways To Know You Really Like Someone}

5. He Has Had Something Close to a Breakdown in Front of You

Men are very guarding of their emotions. If, for any reason, a man opens up to you, at least to the point where you can sense him having a breakdown, then you should know he is totally smitten by you. 

He doesn’t only feel safe around you. He feels very drawn toward you as well. 

You owe such a man one thing: kindness. 

Be kind enough to soothe his feelings and not use them against him in the future. 

6. He Reaches out to You Multiple Times along the Course of his Day

The major difference between a man who has been smitten by one and a man who has not is either the absence or presence of ego.

A man who has not yet been smitten by you will have a lot of egos and, as such, will often think twice before reaching out to you twice. This is especially true if he felt you had ignored him the first time. 

However, a man who is smitten would not take it as anything. He will reach out to you multiple times within the day just to know how you are doing. 

7. He Wants to Know what is Going on With You

Another way to know if a man is smitten by you is by observing how often he seeks to know what is going on with you. 

If he really is smitten, he will insist you tell him everything, even the most minute detail. 

He is also going to remember everything you tell him!

He will listen to you whenever you seek to talk and would expect that you do the same for him whenever he needs you. 

Read: 10 Kissing Styles and What They Say About Him

8. He Feels Good About Helping

Men can be very amazing helpers when they are smitten by women. I believe this has something to do with their biology. 

Men do not want women they love to ever have to deal with life alone. 

If he truly is smitten by you, he will want to know what bugs you and will seek to help even when you insist that he doesn’t.

“But I just want to help. It is fine. You aren’t bugging me.” It is something you will hear often. 

9. He Starts to Adopt your Mannerisms

This is one of the last signs that show up when he has been smitten by you. He will start to adopt your mannerisms, both in speech and in gestures. 

He will start to say things you are known to say or do things you are known to do. 

If your friends mention that he has begun to behave similarly to you, that is such a big sign that he is smitten. {Read: What Does it Mean When he Keeps Staring at you}

10. He Says So

Some guys are a bit more open about the things they feel and will jokingly tell you that you are making them feel some type of way.

Be smart enough to know they mean these jokes!


Guys may be great at hiding their feelings. But signs always show up from time to time. You should be able to spot these slips and conclude whether or not a guy is smitten by you. 

By QuietYearning Editors

The QuietYearning Team covers everything from relationships to lifestyle to parenting and more. Its team of experts provides in-depth analysis that helps you understand complex topics on relationships.

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