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10 Signs He Doesn’t Want You Sexually

by | Love

Jul 1, 2023

It can be exhausting when you have to question what a man thinks of you and the ‘relationship’ you both share. The internal dialogues never stop. Does he like me sexually? Does he not like me sexually? In this article, we want to be a part of your internal dialogue as that voice that tells you fact-based truths. Here are 10 signs he does not want you sexually.

1. He does Not Reach Out if You Don’t

Attraction is a big determining factor in how often a person reaches out to you. I have seen that people who are not attracted to you are going to reach out to you considerably less than people who are burning in attraction. 

If he does not reach out to you as much as you reach out to him, it means he is not interested in you sexually. 

Men are often very invested in women before the sex happens because that intense sexual energy drives them into seeking the woman out.

2. He Does not Speak to You with Emotion

Humans have evolved ways to speak to each other that go beyond words. We speak with sound and emotion.

You can tell how a person feels about you by the sound of their voice when you both speak. 

A man who does not want you sexually will almost always sound bland when he talks to you.

There will be no moments of vulnerability. 

He will speak to you as though he is speaking to just someone who comes around him from time to time. 

If conversations that attempt to open him up are struck, he will smartly drift away into another conversation.

Read: 10 Signs of Mommy Issues in Men to Watch Out For

3. He Has His Eyes on Someone Else

It is possible for a man to be sexually interested in two women at the same time. But the chances of this being the case with a man who always seems to chase is very small. It is almost non-existent.

If he has his eyes on someone else whilst you are present in this life, it is time to embrace the difficult truth that he may not want you sexually.

He is probably never going to want you, either. I know. It is a very difficult truth to embrace, but you will be better off accepting it.

4. He Has Never Mentioned Sex

Men are very sexual with women they want. And it is because a man’s attraction is more tilted to the sexual than the emotional, which is the very opposite with women.

If he does not mention sex to you, even as a joke, then there is bad news. He may not want you. The chances are very high. 

If you doubt this, you can perform a very simple test. When next you speak to him, ask what he thinks sex should feel like. If he laughs it off and changes the conversation, he may not be so attracted to you. 

5. His Jokes are the Kind Men Share with Their Buddies

Men speak to themselves in a way that is entirely different from the way they speak to women. The jokes have sharper edges. The conversations are about more bizarre things.

The moment he begins to speak to you as though you are one of the boys, there is something wrong. It just shows that he sees you as one of the boys, which is sad because men almost never develop any sexual attraction for one of the boys.

Read: 10 Signs He Sees You as Someone Special

6. He Introduces You as His Friend

Whenever a man is with a woman he wants sexually, he will beam with some kind of pride when asked if she is his girlfriend. He is going to say yes without hesitating. 

The opposite happens when he is with a woman he does not want sexually. When asked who she is to him, he is going to say, “She is my friend.”

This is especially true if a woman he wants sexually asks this question. I remember when I was in high school, and a lady I had been friends with asked if the girl by my side was my girlfriend. 

I was very sexually interested in the woman who asked the question. So, of course, my answer was No. 

7. Too Little Body Contact, if Ever

If it is you who always establishes contact, then you have to come to terms with the fact that he does not want you sexually.

If a man wants you sexually, it is certain that he will try to establish bodily contact with you whenever the opportunity presents itself. 

He will hug you longer; he will hold your face and sometimes even try to kiss you.

No touch means the guy is either incredibly shy or doesn’t want you. I will place my bet on the latter.  

8. There is No Jealousy at All

Jealousy, when it is healthy, is a marker of sexual attraction. When a guy is attracted to you, there is at least supposed to be some jealousy.

If he does not seem jealous at all, no matter what you do, he does not want you sexually. He may want you as a friend or someone he talks to about his relationships. But I am pretty sure he does not want you sexually.

If there is a one-in-a-million chance that he does, he just wants it to be a casual thing.  

Read: 15 Red Flags In Men You Have to Know

9. He Suggests Men You Should Hit On

Men who don’t want you sexually will not only be fine with other men wanting you sexually. They will even go as far as encouraging you to seek out other men.

If it ever gets to this point, know that you are so deep in the friend zone it may be impossible to get out.

10. He is Fine with Stepping on Your Toes

Men who want you sexually are going to be nice at first.

This niceness exists to make you comfortable and more open to their advances. Even though it usually clears out later on, it is there to help seduction run smoothly. 

Men who have no problems stepping on your toes at first do not want you sexually.

Read: What Do Guys Think About The Girls They Hook Up With


The signs are clear when a man does not want you.

By Ubee

Ubong Johnson (Ubee) is a relationship expert and writer. He writes articles that cover everything from relationships and nutrition to lifestyle. His works have appeared in several literary magazines, including The Shallow Tales Review, Ngiga Review, and the Kalahari Review. He is the founder and editor of Fiction Niche.

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