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How to Lead a Woman

by | Love

Apr 6, 2024

Women love to be led. This is something men don’t understand fully. What many women hate and kick against is being subdued and defeated or controlled. While a controlling man will almost always miss it with women, a man who can lead will be such a great source of strength for his woman and will enjoy his relationship. You can become that man. Here is how to lead a woman.

1. It is a relationship, not a conquest

This is the first and most important thing to note when you are learning to lead your woman. Your relationship is a partnership. Not a conquest. There is no one amongst you both who is greater than the other. 

You both are one and the same. And you owe it to each other to respect and care for yourselves. 

Your partner should be your partner. You should not try to dominate her. You should lead her lovingly. 

In fact, you never for one second should compel her to follow you. In relationships, followership is a choice. She has to be the one who compels herself to follow you. 

She has to look upon your admirable features and walk by you. 

2. Lead by example

In relationships, you lead by example. You don’t say: “I want you do to this.”

Your actions should be what speaks for you. 

If you want your woman to act a certain way, you have to act that way first. You have to show her that this is a proper and appropriate way to act.

She would eventually follow you because she admires you and finds you worthy of her love. 

You know a woman is very into you when she follows you. 

This is even applicable in the dating phase. When a woman begins to like a guy, she begins to copy his mannerisms. 

She begins to sound like and speak like him. She may even begin to move her arms like he does. It is usually very beautiful to watch, and goes to show how admiration can drive someone to make changes that suit their relationships. 

3. Love her. And show it

Love is the currency for leadership in every relationship. Men have to learn to love their spouses. Deeply so. 

And they should not love in silence. Men have a thing for “loving” in silence. 

Understand that your woman cannot read your mind. 

Your mind is yours and what she hears you say or do, is hers to keep. 

Love her. And love her genuinely. Never for once see her like someone who should be conquered. 

Love her in the way you speak. Love her in the things you do when she is not there. Usually, it is what a person does when you are not there that shows the extent of their love for you. 

4. Respect her

Love is respect. And it is this respect that differentiates your leading from that of her boss. Your respect for your spouse should drive her into submission. 

The word submission usually draws on a lot of backlash, especially in Western societies. It shouldn’t. Submission in relationships does not mirror the kind seen between bosses and employees. 

Submission in relationships speaks of the deep trust that drives a woman to let go of her doubts and follow her man, knowing that he wants the best for her. 

She will not submit to you when you do not respect her. In fact, she will greatly oppose your leadership.

Is your woman opposing you? Then, check the depth of your respect for her. Deepen it. 

5. Be in tune with your faith

Every leader must be led. You, as the man who wants to lead your woman, must be driven by deep faith in something. 

It is up to you to choose who you want to believe in. It can be anything. But let your faith keep you in a great mental shape on days when it is so hard to move on. 

A leader must be stronger than the ones following him. You need to be strong for your woman. 

So, have an unwavering faith in the future you both share. 

Develop your mind. Read a lot. You’re going to lead her with your mind. 

6. Provide for her

It is the traditional role of a man to provide for his family. You should be ready to provide for your woman. 

She deserves that bit of love. Be there for her when she needs you. Try as much as you can to give her everything she needs. 

You don’t have to make the mistake most men make when providing for her. Don’t do it grudgingly. This puts women off. 

Grudges are a thing of the weak. Don’t show weakness, or she will rethink following you. 

7. Don’t complain

This is why I emphasized strength earlier. Don’t complain about anything. Men don’t complain and nag. Leave that to your woman, who is emotional and relies on her emotions. 

You should rely on your logic. 

Rather than complain, you should fix. A man is a fixer.

Find a solution. Establish a boundary. 

If your woman is doing something you don’t like, call her out. Tell her you think what she is doing is not great. Do so from a position of power and not of fear. A lot of men cannot call out their women because they are afraid doing so is going to mess up the peace of the relationship. 

I’ll tell you what: not calling her out is going to mess up the peace even more. So, it is best you stir some trouble now and let go forever, or keep mute and wait for the trouble to stir itself. 


8. Seek her counsel

Every leader has to be advised every now and then. And you should show yourself as a great leader by seeking counsel from your woman when you feel confused. It promotes trust and respect. 


A woman will follow a man she can trust. A man who loves her.

By Martin Corden

Martin Corden is a certified relationship expert and a songwriter from Australia. He loves researching and writing. Martin loves finding new ways to improve and inspires others to be their best version and work together towards it. Martin has a wide range of intellectual and artistic interests.

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