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How To Handle Someone With Low Emotional Intelligence

by | Mental Health

Nov 15, 2020

Emotional intelligence is one of the things everyone needs to become a success in life. It shows how you’re able to control your feelings concerning other people. Dealing with a partner or other people with low emotional intelligence can be challenging. You’ll need wisdom, experience, strategy, and perseverance to get things in order. Here are some ways to deal with a person with low emotional intelligence.

1. Listen More Than You Talk

People with low emotional intelligence like to talk a lot. They have a deep desire to get their point across without minding the listener’s position. As someone with higher emotional intelligence, you can’t argue with them. 

They’ll keep talking, and you won’t get anything from the conversation. You have to play a big brother. Listen more than you talk to give them a chance for expression. Understand their emotional state and reply with wisdom mixed with perseverance.

2. Practice a Positive Attitude

Keep a positive attitude when dealing with someone with low emotional intelligence. People with low emotional quotients tend to frustrate you in a way that messes with your mind. They complain a lot about so many things and have very little remorse. A positive attitude puts your mind in the position always to expect the best. 

Positive people have a way of commanding respect, which is another good thing for you. Having a positive mind will provide you with emotional energy to be able to withstand their push. You’ll also be in a position of control without pressuring your partner or others with low emotional intelligence. 

3. Be Patient With Their Emotional Outbursts

Sudden outbursts might be a result of traits or medical conditions. It can be challenging to deal with people who flare up at the slightest provocation. It would help if you remained calm to deal with this, no matter the situation. Resist the temptation to shout back at them. Instead, remain calm and talk in an even tone. 

If you can’t stand their presence, then walk away. Find a peaceful place to relax, breathe, and regain your sanity. They will soon be back, begging for your forgiveness. At that time, you must let them understand the devastation of their behavior. They must know why they have to limit their anger. 

4. Recognize The Foundation Of Their Emotions

People with emotional issues find it hard to understand their emotions. They also do not know how to measure other people’s emotions and responses. So, it would help if you recognized the foundation of what makes them behave the way they do. When you master this, you’ll be able to predict them more often [1]. 

Also, knowing how someone will react is a powerful weapon. Use it anytime you’re dealing with them to get ahead of their ranting. Once you’re able to master this, you will take control of most of the situation. 

5. Help Them Improve Their Social Skills

Social skills help you to better relate to the people around you. Lessons you learn from the interaction are essential to studying body language. Don’t rush them into it; start with small interactions every day. Practice maintaining eye contact to help improve emotional connection. 

Furthermore, help them create goals and encourage them to see them through. The feeling of success builds confidence and promotes friendliness. You can also get books on social skills for them to read so they can learn more. 

Read: Ways to Find Yourself Again in a Relationship

6. Challenge Them To Be More Self-Aware

Self-awareness is a powerful personality trait that promotes better living. The more you know who you are, the better you understand others. Also, the fewer complications and confrontations you will have with people. You can handle people with low intelligence by helping them become more self-aware. 

You can do this by encouraging them to learn new skills. An individual with low emotional intelligence will know more about their abilities when they do better in their new knowledge. 

Travelling is also a way to see things in new ways. Take them on a journey to places they’ve never been before. Help them see the world from an exciting perspective that will inspire and motivates them. 

7. Be A Better Communicator

The ability to communicate will go a long way in helping you deal with someone with low emotional intelligence. Effective communication deals with important issues and lays them to rest. 

Pay attention to body language and try to see where they’re going before they take the first step. Even in an argument, try to find common ground with them [2]. 

Whenever you’re having a conversation, knows what you’re talking about. Ask questions more often and try to get answers without forcing things. 

Read: Tips For Communicating Easily

8. Have Empathy 

People will low emotional intelligence will need a lot of your empathy. Most of them are insecure and will find it hard to get things right. Having empathy for someone starts with putting yourself in their shoes. If you were in this situation, how would you react? 

Cultivate a sense of curiosity to try to see what’s wrong with them. When dealing with them, explore the heart and not the head alone. Ask them important questions and make sure they give you feedback about them. 

9. Advise Rather Than Correct Them 

People will low emotional intelligence will most likely make silly choices. When they talk to you about this, you will have a strong desire to correct them. If you do this, they will think you’re trying to control them. They may also conclude that you are trying to say they don’t know what they’re doing. 

Instead of dishing out corrections, it’s better to give them advice. Give them multiple alternative options to convince them you’re not giving orders. Also, watch the tone that you use to deliver your message.

10. Don’t Dwell On The Past

If you want things to work, you have to forget about the past. Someone with low emotional intelligence will leave a trail of wrongdoing in your history. Their emotional outbursts and inconsiderate actions will remain in your mind. Dwelling on the past will reopen old wounds and hurt both of you. 

They may even have a hard time dealing with it than you. Always look into the future and find out ways both of you can co-exist without too much drama. Build trust over time and help them work on their emotions with experience.

Photo by Masha Raymers from Pexels

By Aleksandra Nico

Dr. Aleksandra Nico is a licensed clinical psychologist. She is in private practice in Brunswick and has experience in a wide variety of areas, including mood-related difficulties, anxiety, psychosis, trauma, addictions, personality disorders, and anger management. Dr. Nico completed a Ph.D. at the University of Nevada.

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