QuietYearning Logo Light

About Us

Contact Us

Sign Up

How to Get a Boyfriend: 10 Simple Steps to Get The Right Guy

by | Meeting People, Moving On

Oct 11, 2022

If you’re wondering how to get a boyfriend, you’ve come to the right place. If you want a boyfriend but don’t know how it works, keep reading; in this article, we will be telling you how to get not just a boyfriend but the best man out there. 

Getting a boyfriend is the first step toward finally having someone to cuddle with and love, so you really can’t go wrong. The process is quite easy, and you’ll have a great guy before you know it. While getting a guy might seem daunting, I will walk you through the steps you need to make it as smooth as possible.

Look at these 10 steps to get a boyfriend.

1. Know Why you Need a Boyfriend

The first step, really, is to answer the question: “Why do I need a boyfriend right now?” 

The answer to this question is going to guide a number of choices you make. Be sure you don’t want a boyfriend for unachievable reasons. Beginning a relationship with unattainable expectations is the surest way to get your heart broken. 

2. Understand What Romantic Relationships Really Are

If you have not been in one before, you need to understand how romantic relationships work before seeking out a boyfriend. 

Romantic relationships involve two people deeply in love with one another, coming together to push each other forward. No, it does not mean complete dependence on the other partner. Depending on the other partner always is called codependency and can lead to a toxic environment. 

It means living completely independent lives while being there for each other. 

Romantic relationships also require a lot of trust and commitment—I’ll discuss this in the following paragraphs. 

Related: 10 Surefire Signs He Has a Girlfriend

3. Deal With Your Trust Issues if You Have Any

The trick is that if you have many trust issues, you probably aren’t ready for a relationship. It is best you stay single and work on yourself until you are healthy enough to trust someone completely and wholeheartedly—relationships are built on trust, and if you can trust someone, you can build a relationship with them. 

“If you can trust someone, you can build a relationship with them.” 

4. Visualize the Kind of Boyfriend you Want

This works to sieve out all the kinds of guys you don’t want and narrows your focus on the ones you consider good for you. 

The truth remains that the minute you decide to be open to relationships, a number of guys will approach you. If you do not have a clear picture of the kind of man you want, you just might fall for someone who will make relationships very tough for you. 

Check out this article which will guide you on how to stop falling for the wrong guy.

Picture what passes as the right boyfriend for you; his height, complexion, and tone—everything. Now, tell yourself that you deserve that and won’t settle for anything less than that.

5. Become Friendlier

A lot of times, it is you who keeps yourself from getting a boyfriend. Chances are, you do it unconsciously. You look too stern, so no one wants to really approach you even though you are the hottest girl in the room.

Do anything that makes you seem friendlier and more approachable. Put in some work to appear less stern. Smile more. Give compliments to anyone you consider attractive. You are most likely someone who receives a lot of compliments every day. When next a compliment comes your way, be open to receiving it with a smile and maybe another compliment. 

For example, if someone tells you: “You look good.” A great way to respond to this is to smile and say: “Hey, you too; I like your shirt.” 

Related: How to Make a Guy Fall in Love With You

6. Become More Attractive

Men are visual beings—they usually go after what is appealing to their eyes. That is to say, they will come after you, indicating a romantic interest when you become more attractive, feminine, friendly, and appealing. 

It is important, then, that you pay attention to how you look and act. Your clothes should be just the right fit, your hair should be well-kept, and your shoes just right. Wear the perfect cologne, and smile more. 

Walk with a feminine essence, exuding this warmness that men cannot resist. And remember, when a man comes to you, carefully weigh him through the mental picture you have of what your boyfriend should look like.

7. Be Where the Men Are

This is to say: don’t just sit at home all day or shy away from gatherings. The best way to get a boyfriend is to be in a pool of potential boyfriends. If they don’t see you, they won’t be able to approach you or make their intentions clear to you. 

When next your friends invite you to a hangout, don’t just say no. Give attending a try—and remember, be friendly to whoever comes along to talk to you. Listen to them; tell them about yourself if that is fine, and share laughter together. 

8. Try Out Dating Sites

Another pool of potential boyfriends exists on social media and dating sites. Place yourself there, an attractive woman seeking to get an equally attractive and honorable man, and you will likely attract a man just like the one you had visualized. 

Post attractive pictures; share your opinions in a polite, attractive way. Respond to texts, and share those little moments that deepen into love. 

Read: 10 Signs He is a Womanizer

9. Learn to Communicate More

How to get a boyfriend? This one is a no-brainer: learn how to communicate. Communication does not only mean talking. It means being able to know the right time to talk and the right time to listen. 

Become an engaging conversationalist, basically. Learn to tell stories that have men wanting to listen to you more. Spin around humor that makes them laugh. Whenever a man you find attractive indicates interest in you, take it upon yourself to get him hooked so that he always desires to spend time with you.

10. Go on Dates

Choose: when you have been able to attract just the kind of men you want, you will then be saddled with the responsibility of choosing. But choose the man who makes you happiest, with whom you feel the most like yourself, and go on dates with him. This is your choice to make.


You attract the people who are most alike to you. So, if you want to get a boyfriend you can completely trust and love, then it is time to look inward. 

By Ubong

Ubong Johnson is a medic, writer, and editor whose writings explore the complexities of human interactions. He has been published on The Healing Muse, a journal by Upstate Medical University, Blood and Thunder, a journal from Oklahoma University Medical College, and other journals of humanities. Ubong lives in Lagos and is currently undergoing training as a behavioral psychologist.

Read Next

What is the Interaction Phase?
What is the Interaction Phase?

The interaction phase is something we have mentioned a lot in our articles here on QuietYearning. At QuietYearning, we group romantic relationships into three main phases, each of which serves a very important function in ensuring the relationship...

How to Rizz Up a Girl
How to Rizz Up a Girl

Rizzing up a girl involves interacting with her in a way that makes her very attracted to you within a short period of hours, days, or a few weeks. Whereas some guys get it easy, it is as hard as rocket science for some guys. In this article, we show you how to rizz...

Get our relationship newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest relationship updates from our team.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Pin It on Pinterest